Underneath the clay
There is a story about the Golden Buddha. It is said that back in 1957, a group of monks were in the process of relocating an entire monastery. During this process, they were moving a giant clay Buddha. Upon closer inspection, one of the monks observed a large crack in the clay and noticed a glowing golden light emanating from within. Fascinated, the monk decided to use a hammer and chisel to chip away at the clay. And the statue turned out to be made of solid gold! Historians say the Buddha statue had been coated in clay by Thai monks centuries ago to protect it from an attack by the Burmese army. Sadly, all the monks died during the attack, and it was only in 1957 that the glorious golden statue was discovered.
The story reminded me of a heart-to-heart conversation I had with my mother. I asked her why she seemed so hard on me, almost like she wasn't my mother. She explained that it was because I was a sensitive person, and she wanted to protect me from the harshness of the world. In my experience, my mother used a lot of "clay" to shield the golden part of me, my sensitivity, from being destroyed by others. For a long time, I resented my mother's behavior without understanding the reason behind it. But I eventually recognized and embraced my sensitivity as a valuable trait, almost like a superpower, and understood that my mother was simply trying to protect me. I no longer hold any resentment towards her or myself.
It's common for people to be labeled as clay statues because they appear covered in clay, leading them to believe they are just that. However, everyone possesses a divine source or inner being that has nothing to do with what we see with human eyes. When I was disconnected from that source, I felt like Sabrina, covered in clay and experiencing a lot of suffering. But when you connect with your higher self, external factors don't affect you because they aren't a part of who you truly are; you can’t relate. Only when you identify with the clay do you become miserable and affected by everything around you. If you knew that you were gold, you wouldn't define yourself by job title, marital status, or worldly relationships. My mother's explanation for her overprotectiveness helped me realize that the clay can be shed, and I don't need to protect myself or view others through their clay masks. We are all just gold inside.
Once you grasp this concept, you realize that no one is inherently bad or hostile. Rather, their negative traits may result from past hurts, neglect, or abuse. These characteristics are like a protective layer that they have built around themselves, the only language they know how to speak, the only part of themselves they feel connected to, and the only way they know how to connect with others. People can only give what they have, sometimes resulting in hurtful behavior toward others. However, when you recognize that you too are a work in progress, you are not impacted by others' shortcomings. Instead of questioning why someone is acting a certain way, you understand that they have likely experienced difficult circumstances that have shaped them. Your hope for them is that someday they will recognize the flaws in their own protective layer and work to remove them, revealing the beauty within.
May this finds your heart open to receive.
